Lipscomb Scandals

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Lipscomb Scandals

shhhhh...

shhhhh...

shhhhh...

shhhhh...

Anonymous

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To all you who crave living though other people, here is some fresh gossip hot off the streets. It’s crazy, scandalous, and utterly shocking. What is the world coming to?  Bless their hearts.

Rumor has it Hudson Parker was caught naked, singing, My Heart Will Go On by Celine Deon, in the shower in the boys locker room.

Sawyer Wallace was seen secretly buying Chick-Fil-A nuggets from senior Riley Raff during sixth period.

Mr. Musick gave senior favorite Meg Bobo detention for proving he did an AP Biology lab wrong. Bobo is in talks with Bart Durham.

Carol Witt and Lanny Witt were spotted on camera by Robert King canoodling in the balcony of Acuff. Mercy!

Favorite Spanish teacher Señorita Giles was arrested for being a member of the Mexican Queso cartel. Bail was set at 2000 pesos and 500 jalapeños. She and cell mate El Chapo have been getting along beautifully.

Lipscomb security has just hired John Adam Bevels to tow away illegally parked cars. He’ll be “rollin’ coal” on all of those college kids taking up our parking spaces.

An anonymous witness heard Ryan Lusk rapping sick rhymes in the faculty bathroom.

Katherine Gaw and Gracie Simpson were spotted skipping class to take selfies in the center court of the high school gym like real ballers.

Ryan Wee re-enacted his all too famous pick up line from the Mr. Acuff pageant on a mystery girl in senior hallway last week. She fainted.

Whether these rumors are true or not, now that’s one secret I’ll never tell.

~XOXO, Pony Express~

 

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